In my attempts to lose weight and adopt a healthier lifestyle, I am learning that some of my assumptions about food and nutrition are not, in actuality, true. It turns out that these facts are not, in fact, facts:
- If you put anything in a salad bowl, it counts as a salad. (Corollary: Any toppings, such as maraschino cherries and chocolate chips, count as croutons.)
- An entire box of Girl Scout cookies is considered one serving.
- Eating an entire bag of gummi bears at breakfast is beneficial1.
- Since brown rice is good for you, white rice, fried rice, and rice pudding are too.
- Any green food, including green M&Ms, are vegetables.
- A Terry's Chocolate Orange contains the same nutritional benefits as an orange.
- If you don't eat at least one piece of chocolate a day, you will die.
- By law, every man must eat at least 20 pounds of chicken wings during the Super Bowl.
1 Apparently, you're just supposed to have one Flintstone Children's Gummie Vitamin. And that's if you're a child.