If The Four Questions had a hammer, they would hammer in the morning, they would hammer in the morning, they would in the newsroom ...
Q. What is Dave wearing?
A. In anticipation of the continuous cacophony of banging, clanging, rumbling and jolts at work today (see this previous post for an explanation), Dave is swathed in bubble wrap and wearing noise-cancelling headphones.
Q. How does Dave feel today?
A. Dave's stomach feels a little off. He blames the garlic salsa that Britt bought last night. Dave suspects the secret ingredient was rancid cat food.
Q. What are the factors affecting Dave's mood today?
A. Dave does not believe the mild queasiness and periodic low-bass vibrations at work are ingredients for a happy, fun, productive day.
Q. Why must Dave always be a pessimist?
A. Dave replies: "Experience."